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Minimum Effort, Minimum Results

by Hot Cops

supported by
GRUNK [Ollie Pawsey]
GRUNK [Ollie Pawsey] thumbnail
Michael Cox
Michael Cox thumbnail
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1.
Crappy Days 00:56
lyrics
Again and again, day after day, Spent the whole week just waiting for the end, Trapped in this job, this way of life, Smoke, grind, drink and thrash! Crappy days, smoke and grindcore, Happy days, drink and thrash! We’re built for speed, and we live for the smash. Surviving on blastbeats, weed and buckfast. DIY or die, live to go fast, Smoke, grind, drink and thrash!
2.
Sharing's Not Caring 00:41
lyrics
Filter the bullshit, brain to mouth, Review your life while looking at the floor. No one cares about your shit, You're acting like a fucking prick Throw your toys out of the pram Just make sure that everybody knows, Your petty problems always front page news You just can't take it anymore Just make sure that everybody knows Your petty problems always front page news
3.
Climbing For Dollars 01:31
lyrics
Our demo CD cost us nearly a grand, We’ve not even played our debut show, It’s all cut and paste ‘cos we can’t do it live, But our stage moves are all well rehearsed. Check out our new music video (woah-oh) We’ll make it big one day. We paid for our song on a magazine CD, Look we are on track seventeen! We paid to be on this forgotten band’s tour, Look we are on just after doors... Check out our new music video (woah-oh) We’ll make it big one day (our manager says) We have a cool promo photo (woah-oh) Yeah we’re a pretty big deal (check out our weekend long tour) Metal to the masses, battle of the bands Please vote for us, please vote for us. We’ll show you our new song if we get a hundred likes, Please vote for us, please vote for us.
4.
Shameful Self Promotion 00:36
lyrics
Where’s our petrol money? Where’s our vegan curry? Where’s the crowd you said? Where’s the cymbal stands? You dragged us here to fuck us about Your mate’s band is still playing their shit fucking riffs Not said two words to us all night But determined to claim you ‘support the scene’ Four hours home You just fuck off Weaken the world With your shit attitude Fuck off! Fuck off! Fuck off! Prick!
5.
I Wish I Was Dead 01:09
lyrics
Fueled by a hate over nothing at all, Just shit bedroom riffing and angst. Chasing an image 15 years out of date, Clown-faced camoflage prats. I wish I was dead, wish I was dead, wish I was dead. My band is the best, we headline the shows, Our drum rack is second to none. We’ll turn up late, go home once we’ve played, Got work in the morning you know. A hundred guitars all in pointy shapes, I wish I was Dimebag or Max, My dorian scale is totally tight, But my riffs they all fucking suck. I wish I was dead, wish I was dead. I wish I was dead, wish I was dead, wish I was dead.
6.
Scum and Villainy 01:06
lyrics
Right wing ballbags, fascist bully boys Polishing their skinheads. Used to be an alright haunt, but now I wouldn’t be caught dead. Shitty fucking metal, shitty fucking politics, Scum and villainy Right wing ballbags, fascist bullyboys, Polishing motorbikes. That band sounds like Lamb Of God, Everything's gone to shit. Recycled rock and karaoke, Blood & honour oi oi dicks, Nothing personal you understand, We just don’t like right-wing pricks. Scum and villainy.
7.
Old Green Bottle 01:09
lyrics
I went to the doctor, 'cause I was unwell He said "my boy, you're all shot to hell I'll write a prescription for sweet tonic wine," an hour later, everything's fine. Old green bottle, she's done me in Sweet fifteen, a right state I'm in. I've drunk it all day, and I've drunk it all night. Old green bottle, light up my life. Pick me up, make me sick. Up when I'm down, then down in a ditch. Break my heart, come back for more, That yellow dress, knocks me to the floor. Old green bottle, she's done me in Sweet fifteen, a right state I'm in. I've drunk it all day, and I've drunk it all night. Old green bottle, light up my life. I am in prison The light never shines I can't see my bottle So dark is the night. Old green bottle, she's done me in Sweet fifteen, a right state I'm in. I've drunk it all day, and I've drunk it all night. Old green bottle, light up my life.
8.
The Fairy Tale of Bridge St 00:56
lyrics
Gorillas in the mist, bashing people for no reason Pissed on Spectra, piss-stained jeans Just. Fuck. Off. It’s the beginning of the end if the knuckle-draggers win Low forehead Shit for brains Stink of puke Staggering Judgement has been passed You’ll get what you deserve It’s the beginning of the end if the knuckle-draggers win They can never win
9.
Hanged and Banged 02:01
lyrics
I cannot see, the light burns my eyes I cannot live, sold my soul to the bar last night. Banging my head to some crucial thrash Two bottles of bucky and I’m feeling fine. Back at home monging to some heavy doom, Oh fuck no what have I done. Hangover bangover! I can’t live no more. Hangover bangover! I can’t live Falling asleep with a mouthful of crisps I’m hanged and banged. Can’t turn my head to the right or the left I’m hanged and banged. I can’t live.
10.
Grief Thief 00:39
lyrics
Made up propaganda, falsified accounts Gather up the gullible, perpetuate the lies Likes equal prayers, a click to show you care Think that pictures show the truth, choose what to believe Facts and figures cloud your judgement, make sure they succeed Likes equal prayers, click to show you care Don't care if it's real, just show them that you feel
11.
Die In A Fire 00:32
lyrics
Who cares if you wrote new riffs, I’d do better with no hands I just took a shit on your dreams I’m the king of all you dicks Die in a fire Die You’re a stain on humanity
12.
Goodbye Cruel World 00:30
lyrics
Rumbling death Punk messiah The choice of our generation Fight to be free Play it faster, do it again Play it louder, leap from the stage Headbanging freaks Legacy eternal Goodbye to the cruelest world Live again Play it faster, do it again Play it louder, leap from the stage

about

Practice room demos, recorded on a phone, fuck you.

credits

released December 31, 2014

Danny: Vocals/Drums
James: Vocals/Guitar

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Hot Cops Northampton, UK

Idiots angry at pricks.

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